spiritual parenting by gopika kapoor

Spiritual Parenting by Gopika Kapoor is a wonderful parenting book to be read by the parents. The book hardly have any build-ups so it’s a breeze to read and writing a summary of the book is really not required. Still for my own future reference and also for others I have jotted down a few good points which I loved in the book.

Gopika gave two advices in the book, First ‘Just do, don’t think and second, Accept that you will have no sleep, then everything will be fine.’ These words by the author made me introspect for hours. Accepting the situation and just keep doing the task at hand sends strong positive signals to our brains and we adjust to the situation without much fretting. It automatically eases things, puts mind to rest and the baby in true sense becomes a bundle of joy.

Here are some more

  • a mother knows her child more than anyone else so always trust your motherly instincts.
  • laugh at the messy situation to ease the tension but never laugh at your child it will hurt his/her self-esteem.
  • make bed time prayer time for the family.
  • steal some time in a day just for yourself. Me-time is equally important to rejuvenate energy. So is the couple-time as birth of the child doesn’t mean death of marriage.
  • First birthday is special not only for the baby who is now one year old but also for parents as they are also one year old as parents. But avoid extravagant bash and flamboyance. Make your child’s birthday a gift for others. Like buy return gifts and similar from NGO.
  • A tip to deal with child while throwing tantrums. Instead of yelling at the screaming child. Start whispering chants, songs, mantras or anything in the ears of the child to soothe down. Well it work beautifully in my case. I started singing rhymes and my son Ved used to calm down immediately. It also saved me from acting rashly.
  • Another tactic was that to give a name to your child’s rash behavior. Even my mother used this trick when I was four or five years old. Whenever I was in bad mood my mother used to say ‘ abhi isme bhoot ghus gaya hai’ and immediately I used to check myself.
  • Some cool tips to melt the hot temper. Like to identify hot spot which triggers anger and avoid it. Explain things to your child rather than allowing them to test your patience, be flexible; loose the leash sometime giving kids some control over their life. In this way they will throw less tantrums. Forgive yourself for being angry but do learn a lesson from it. Say Sorry; It is such a powerful word which is seldom used; This one word has the ability to set the souls free, to lighten the heart and strengthen the relationship.
  • Also explain to your child getting angry is natural. But we had a choice. Either we give up to anger or we fight the anger with calmness and kindness.
  • Disciplining the child is very important for the child himself but not by shouting or smacking but by showing her/him the right path, helping them to distinguish between right and wrong. And by setting right example.
  • Always use a positive tone in your voice. Instead of labeling your child as a bad boy or girl say you are such a good boy/girl please don’t do such a bad thing. Tap the goodness in your child, make him/her to believe it and he/she will obey you.
  • Every child is unique. Respect it. Bring out their best and don’t fret over child’s weaknesses instead make them aware of their strengths. And please don’t compare with other children. Just let your child be a child and enjoy her/his childhood.
  • Now something very important. Your child is also an individual with feeling and right over his/her life. We as parents are chosen to be their caretakers. Child is not an exclusively personal property of parents. Every parent has to understand this and let-go your child to fly high instead of tugging them to you.
  • Next is about detachment which according to Gopika is not giving up family, job, comforts and living without them, loving your family less. But it is giving up unnecessary clingy and possessiveness towards object and people.   
  • Live in today. Spend as much time as you can with your child. Play as much as you can with your child. Because tomorrow friends, school, homework, sports etc will be his/her priority over spending time with parents.
  • Give your child memories which they could relive in future.
  • You are watched constantly if not listened by your child. So mind your manners and set good examples.
  • Gopika writes about white lies which is a very difficult topic but she pulls it off quite effectively. In fact after reading this chapter I myself become conscious about how many white lies unconsciously I speak throughout the day. 
  • We all want our kids to grow up honest and speak truth but we as adult keep uttering white lies to save our ass in difficult situations. So what is the solution. Simple. Gopika says give your child gift of honesty by being one in life.
  • An extremely important chapter on needs and wants. Like adults, child also falls easily in the vicious trap of desires and from there on starts constant and never-ending demands for objects. To break this trap parents need to make child aware of the fact they are more blessed than others, value of sharing, sense of gratitude and difference between need and want.
  • Take a walk with your kids. It will be a great experience for both of you. Your child will discover new things and you will re-discover those things which are easily ignored in the hassle of life.
  • Why to make your child feel special on just one day that is on birthday. Go beyond birthday’s and anniversaries. Celebrate each day. Make your child feel special and loved everyday.
  • Enthusiasm and excitement makes even boring, painful and mundane things like eating fruits and vegetables, taking medicines interesting.
  • Respect your child’s thoughts, opinions, ideas. Listen to them. 
  • My favorite chapter in the entire book is ‘Learn From Your Children’. I was quite flabbergasted by author’s observation that even little children could teach us so many things like FOCUS: Even though a child’s concentration span is very less but they can immerse themselves completely in whatever they do. FORGIVENESS: ‘Forgive like a child’ a very famous line. OUT OF SIGHT, OUT OF MIND, JOY: Who said a children needs expensive toys to make them happy. They are equally happy playing with the carry bag in which came the expensive toy. Following Dreams: Kids are dreamers something which we adults forget to do. Resilience: Kids have the ability to bounce back immediately. 
  • Have faith in your child. Don’t keep them in your protective shield all the time. They need to be prepared for the brutal world outside. Don’t scare your child if he/she wants to step out of their comfort zone. Let them try new things. 
  • Your thoughts are energy in itself which keep revolving in universe. So always think positively. 
  • Be a miser in spending money but not when it comes to expressing love to your child and family. Three magical words ‘I Love You’ but without any terms and conditions.

Read Spiritual Parenting  Review

0.00 avg. rating (0% score) - 0 votes

Ritu Mantri

Ritu is an avid book reader. She also reviews books and have reviewed around 200+ books till date. Her target is to finish 1000 books.

This Post Has One Comment

Leave a Reply

Close Menu
%d bloggers like this: